We have tantalizing dreams.
We have exhilarating plans.
We have dazzling goals.
And we keep dreaming.
We keep making plans.
We keep setting goals.
Without actually taking any action.
Without getting our hands dirty and doing the work.
Without diving in and making things happens.
Because we are trapped in our own lie.
That we need to have it all perfectly figured out before we can get started.
That we need to have all the answers upfront.
That we need to build in that seeming guarantee for success.
And so our dreams keep floating in thin air.
Our plans only live on paper.
Our goals are still far away.
But imagine for a moment that we would live without that lie.
That we would know that we can figure it out as we go.
That we would know that we just need to take the next step.
That we would know that we just need to do the very next thing.
Honing in on our dreams, our plans, our goals with every step we take.
How many more dreams would we realise?
How many more goals would we reach?
One step at a time, figuring it all out as we go.
Not because we’re nonchalant.
Or don’t care that much.
Or have that halfhearted “oh, we’ll see”-attitude.
But because we’re determined.
And care so very much.
And wholeheartedly wanna dive in.
Finding answers as we go.
Learning from the steps we’ve taken already.
Being teached by our awesome successes and our brilliant mistakes.
Checking in with our dreams, our plans, our goals.
Figuring out the next step.
While walking.
That’s what gets us there.
Photo from here.
Just keep moving forward
and
don’t give a shit
about what anybody thinks.
Do what you have to do.
For you.
~ Johnny Depp
Sometimes I’m afraid to ask.
Because I’m afraid of the “no” I’ll get.
Because I think that that “no” means I’m not good enough.
No, you’re not a good enough writer.
No, you’re not interesting enough.
No, you’re not a good enough friend.
And it’s not that you are telling me that.
It’s just me.
Telling that to myself.
Abundantly and in anticipation of the dreaded “no”.
And so I don’t ask.
But imagine all the “yesses” I’ve missed.
But imagine all the great opportunities that I let slip by because I’m afraid of a “no”.
That might not even come.
So I made a deal with myself.
From now on, I’ll just ask.
Expecting a “yes” or a “no”. Both are fine.
Because a “yes” doesn’t mean I’m great.
And a “no” doesn’t mean I’m not good enough.
It’s just what I’m making them mean.
I know I’m wholeheartedly imperfectly giving it my all and doing my thing.
And just that is making me more than good enough.
Regardless of what you might say.
Photo from here.
I used to think that only big actions could bring me to my goal.
I used to think that only huge steps forward counted.
Fast and forward.
That’s what I needed.
But I used to find myself stuck a lot. Never far enough. Never good enough.
I used to find myself procrastinating and wasting my time away.
Standing still, unhappy with where I was.
That’s what I got instead.
Then, one day, I made a deal with myself.
From now on, I would take it one small step at a time.
From now on, I would do something every day.
From now on, I would treat even the smallest thing as an accomplishment.
And so I did.
I started doing the little things, taking one small step each day.
I started counting each small action I took as a success.
Because I showed up, and regardless of the outcome.
And all of a sudden, I realised that I was walking.
Steadily. Empowered.
One step at a time. Amazed at how far I’d gone already.
One tiny success a day.
Are you standing still because you don’t make the little things count?
What tiny step can you take today?
Photo from here.
Sometimes I give because I secretely want something in return.
Sometimes I want you to do me a favor.
Sometimes I want you to like me.
Sometimes I want you to not get mad at me.
Sometimes I want you to not get disappointed in me.
Sometimes I want you to approve of me.
Sometimes I want your help.
Sometimes I want you to say how great I am.
And so I give.
And wait for you to give something back to me.
But then nothing happens.
And I feel disappointed.
Not that I asked you for a favor in return.
Not that I made my request for your love, approval or help public.
Often I even don’t make these requests public to myself.
But I always give myself away.
Because of the way I feel after I’ve given and got nothing in return.
And so I made a deal with myself. To give unconditionally.
You don’t like me. I don’t care.
You don’t say how great I am. I don’t care.
You don’t help me. I don’t care.
I gave because I wanted to.
I gave you my time and attention because I loved to listen.
I helped you out because I care about you.
I gave you that present because choosing that gift for you made me so excited.
I gave you my smile because I genuinely thought you were funny.
I gave you a different perspective because doing that lights my fire.
I hugged you because I love you.
I made a deal with myself. To give unconditionally.
And sometimes that means that you don’t get what you used to get from me anymore.
Because I noticed I just gave you something because I secretely wanted something in return from you.
And so I stopped giving. Or told you what I wanted.
Sometimes that makes you feel disappointed.
And that’s fine with me, because I know that it is not me doing that.
It’s just your thoughts about what you think I should do.
I give because I want to give, whatever you do.
And that makes me such a generous giver.
Photo from here.
I almost cannot believe it.
Tomorrow, exactly 1 year ago, on January 17th, I hit publish on my very first blog post.
It all started with this fabulous quote:
It’s not the years in your life that count.
It’s the life in your years.
~ Abraham Lincoln
Since then, lots of things have happened. A whole year has passed. With ups and downs. With excitement and fears. With laughter and disappointment. But most of all with pride for doing my thing. For keeping at it. For making it work. For picking myself up time and again. For choosing to take the next step each time.
I loved browsing my writings. I loved to see how the same messages kept coming back. Of living our life instead of someone else’s. Of doing our thing, regardless of what other people might think. Of seeing things as they are, not as we think they should be. Of choosing to give it our all, in our own brilliant way at our own pace, imperfectly yet wholeheartedly uniquely ourselves.
Here’s a hand picked selection of 10 posts that spoke to me most when strolling through them. Completely subjective. Just my take. From my vantage point. After 1 year of writing.
Click the titles below to read the related post. Enjoy!
1. The one that started it all.
My very first writing that got published on the blog. I remember working so hard on it. To tweak sentences. To reread. To doubt whether I should blog or not, whether the message would be clear. To wonder whether I would be able to post something week after week, whether I’d not rather give up right away. But I’m so glad I didn’t. I’m so glad I chose to hit publish that day.
2. The one with the 50 ways to leave yourself.
I love it when I get inspired by things I hear, do, see, smell. By things I’ve been through or things I’m going through. But sometimes I get inspired by something I just jotted down. One word brings another one. One idea launches another one. And all of a sudden I hear Paul Simon humming in my head. The 50 ways to leave yourself were born.
3. The one about them.
Sometimes we think that they‘ve got all the answers, that they are so much happier than we are, that they are always so confident. And that we – in contrast – are so lacking, under par, not good enough. But rest assured, they don’t have all the answers, they’ve got sorrows, they struggle with insecurities of their own.
4. The one with the video.
What we focus on is what we see. That’s the truth. And that makes it so easy to mislead ourselves.
5. The one with the poem on success.
Sometimes I write to ponder on where I am in that moment. Sometimes I write to muse about what’s going on for me in that moment. Sometimes a poem flows out.
6. The one with the glass.
The half empty one. Or the half full one. Depends on the perspective you take. Depends on the perspective you choose to take. And which one you choose is not without its consequences.
7. The one that made me cry.
I love it when something so small and seemingly trivial as contact lenses unveils a much deeper lesson and becomes a powerful metaphor. After writing this one, I took the lesson and stopped crying over my lenses.
8. The one that I reread time after time.
Because I want to do things my way, at my pace and live my life instead of someone else’s.
9. The one about good impressions and other paralysing stuff.
This one came from a conversation and really got me thinking and writing. I’ve been in that same paralysing place so many times. And I’ll be in that place so many more times. But I know I can leave that place whenever I want. And that makes all the difference.
10. The one about beauty.
A musing about beauty and what I learned the past year about beauty.
Photo from here.
I work with smart, dynamic and driven people that are ticking all the boxes of success, yet feeling as if they are living their life with the brakes on. I work with caring and generous people that are trying to be everything to everyone and forgetting themselves in the process. I work with savvy, fun and creative high achievers that want to reconnect with what they really want in life, instead of living out everyone else’s expectations and worrying they’re not good enough.
Together, we dive in. Together, we dive deep. I offer a different perspective. I offer tools and concepts and a space to explore. You explore. You take action. You emerge. Bubbly. Sparkly. Infectiously inspiring. The way you’ve always been. You just didn’t realise it yet.Get in touch!
