Success is the beautiful house.
Success is that promotion.
Success is the book deal.
Success is that sales pitch that blew everybody’s mind.
And that is great.
Those are great things to appreciate and cherish.
But the thing is that so often we feel like a loser when we put in the effort and don’t get those results.
Those results have become the only measure of how successful we are.
Failing to get those results equals failing.
And that leaves us powerless. Frustrated. Mad. Sad.
We don’t learn and don’t give it another try, from another angle. We are harsh on ourselves instead.
We don’t move on. We complain about how unfair life is to us.
We don’t look for alternatives. We get stuck in ‘how it should have been‘, ‘what they should have done’.
But the thing is that acquiring those results is so often out of our control.
They decided to sell that beautiful house to someone else.
They choose to promote our colleague.
They said no.
They were not impressed.
Imagine what would happen if we would invest in the action and not in the result.
Imagine what would happen if success would be our action instead of our result.
Talk to the owners of the house, tell them how much we love the house and bid the price that it is worth to us. And then they get to decide.
Give it our all at work, tell our bosses why we’re such an amazing fit for that promotion and deliver that high value work with integrity and style. And then they get to choose.
Write great content, pitch it with enthusiasm, creativity and vigor. And then they get to see whether they think we’re a good fit for their portfolio. Or not.
Really listen to their needs, offer them a spot-on solution to their problem and engage with them in an open conversation. And then they get to make up their mind.
Now, don’t get me wrong.
Results are important.
Results show us what happened with the energy we put out there.
Results tell us what worked and what didn’t.
Results tell us where to adjust, refine or turn upside down.
But they are not a measure of success.
Because that would be unfair.
Letting how we see ourselves depend on external circumstances and other people.
Letting how we value ourselves depend on things that are out of our control.
Imagine what would happen if we would define our actions as a measure of success instead.
Did I give it my all?
Did I show up and take the action I wanted to?
Did I act in line with my values and who I want to be?
Imagine how different that would make us feel.
Powerful. Excited. Energized.
Image how different we would act.
We’d learn and give it another try, from another angle.
We’d look for alternatives.
We’d move on.
Becoming more of who we are with every step we take.
Successful at being us.
Not by accident.
But intentionally and on purpose.
Photo from here.
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The content on this site is intended to inspire readers to live their life instead of someone else's, to ditch the burden of perfection and who they think they're supposed to be. The content on this site is intended to inspire readers to embrace their unique brilliance and share their brilliance with the world, to serve the world from that loving, abundant, creative place of possibility, so that in turn that world becomes a more loving, more abundant, more genuinely generous and compassionate place. The intent of this content and site is not to tell readers how they should live their life. Nor should it be used as a substitute for treatment by or advice of a professional therapist, counselor, psychiatrist or any similar professional caregiver. Any decisions taken by readers are their decisions and their decisions and responsibility only.